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Boss: Where were you born?
Sardar: India ..
Boss: which part?
Sardar: What ‘which part’? Whole body was born in India .
2 sardar were fixing a bomb in a car.
Sardar 1: What would you do if the bomb
explodes while fixing.
Sardar 2: Dont worry, I have one more.
Sardar: What is the name of your car?
Lady: I forgot the name, but is starts with ‘T’.
Sardar: Oh, what a strange car, starts with Tea. All cars that I know start with petrol.
Santa: I think that girl is deaf..
Banta: How do u know?
Santa: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals are new
Santa: Let’s go for movie.
Banta: Shit, I’ve got a doctor’s appointment today..
Santa: Just cancel it,Tell him you’re sick.
Santa and Banta are walking on a road, and they find a 1000 rupee note lying down.
Santa – What should we do now?
Banta- We’ll take 50:50.
Santa- What about the remaining 900?
Once there was a mirror that killed anyone who lied…
French : I think I dont smoke (died).
American : I think I love my wife (died).
Santa: I think.. (died)
best santa banta jokes in english
Santa, hard of hearing, realises that he needs to buy a hearing aid, but he feels unwilling to spend too much money.
‘How much do they cost?’ he asks Manbir, the shopkeeper.
‘That depends,’ says. Manbir, ‘They run from £20 to £2,000.’
‘Let’s see the £20 model,’ asks Santa.
Manbir puts the device around Santa’s neck instructing, ‘You just stick this button in your ear and run this little string down to your pocket.’
‘How does it work?’ Santa inquires.
‘For only £20 it doesn’t work,” Manbir replies, ‘But when people see it on you, they’ll talk louder!’
Sardar: U cheated me.
Shopkeeper: No, I sold a good radio to u.
Sardar: Radio label shows Made in Japan but radio says this is ‘All India Radio! ‘
Santa goes into a bar in New York.
The man on his right orders a drink, ‘Johnnie Walker, single.’
The man on his left says, ‘Jack Daniels, single.’
Santa says. ‘Santa Singh, married.’
Santa and Jeeto were preparing wedding cards for their son at the printers.
Jeeto was not very good at English so she asked the printer to help her. After the printer had presented her with a draft, she quickly pointed out that the “RSVP ” was missing .
The printer was surprised by Jeeto’s knowledge and asked her if she knew what it meant.
Jeeto started to think and after much thought he replied, ‘Vait! I remember. I remember – RSVP. It means “Remember, Send Vedding Present.”‘
Tourist: Whose skeleton is that?
Sardar: An old king’s skeleton.
Tourist: Who’s that smaller skeleton next to it?
Sardar: That was same king’s skeleton when he was a child.
At the scene of an accident a man was crying: O God! I have lost my hand, oh!
Sardar: Control yourself. Don’t cry. See that man. He has lost his head. Is he crying?
NOW THE LAST TWO ULTIMATE:
In an interview, Interviewer: How does an electric motor run?
Sardar: Dhhuuuurrrrrrrrrr. …..
Inteviewer shouts: Stop it.
Sardar: Dhhuurrrr dhup dhup dhup…
Sardar joined new job. 1st day he worked till late evening on the computer. Boss was happy and asked what you did till evening.
Sardar: Keyboard alphabets were not in order, so I made it alright.